When my boys first started playing basketball in the local rec league, it felt simple and fun. Practices were close by, games were on Saturdays, and costs were minimal. Little did I know that transitioning from recreational basketball to select (or AAU) basketball would be a whole new world—one that demanded more of everything: time, money, emotions, and commitment. Here are the five biggest lessons I’ve learned along the way.
1. It’s More Expensive Than You Think
The financial commitment for select basketball can be overwhelming. Between team fees, tournament entry costs, travel expenses, uniforms, and training, the money adds up quickly. And that doesn’t even include the hidden costs like hotel stays, meals on the road, or additional gear your player “absolutely needs.” Just to give you a little insight into what I am talking about, check out my post on the “Real Cost of Boys AAU Basketball.”
2. It’s a Major Time Commitment
Select basketball isn’t just a season; it’s a lifestyle. Practices are often multiple times a week and can be farther away than your local rec gym. One season, we commuted up to an hour each way! Additionally, weekends are dominated by tournaments, and many of those tournaments are not local. At least half of the tournaments will require you to drive or fly in neighboring cities or across the country.
3. There Are More Emotions
The stakes feel higher in select basketball, and with that comes a rollercoaster of emotions—for players and parents alike. There are tears after tough losses, frustration over playing time, and stress about making the “right” team. But there are also incredible highs: watching your child’s hard work pay off, seeing them hit a game-winning shot, or cheering on their growth as both a player and a person. Learning to ride the highs and lows with grace has been one of the biggest challenges and rewards.
4. ‘Ball Is Life’ Is a Real Thing
For families in the world of select basketball, the phrase “ball is life” takes on a whole new meaning. The sport becomes more than a game—it’s a central part of your family’s schedule, social life, and identity. You’ll find yourself talking about basketball at dinner, making friends with other basketball parents, and prioritizing games over other events. It’s intense, but it’s also a unique bond that brings your family closer.
5. Your First Team Won’t Be Your Last Team
One of the hardest lessons to learn is that teams change. Your child’s first select team likely won’t be their last. Players grow, coaches change, and sometimes teams simply aren’t the right fit anymore. It’s tough to leave a team, especially when friendships have formed, but finding the right environment for your child’s development and happiness is worth it. Be prepared for transitions and trust that they’re part of the journey.
Final Thoughts
Moving from rec ball to select ball has been a whirlwind, but it’s also been one of the most rewarding experiences for our family. Watching my boys grow as athletes and individuals has made every sacrifice worthwhile. If you’re considering making the leap, I hope these lessons help you feel a little more prepared for the adventure ahead. And remember: at the end of the day, it’s about supporting your child’s love for the game and creating memories that will last a lifetime.
Feel free to ask me any questions or leave a comment. What have you learned that you wish others knew?
Basketball Mom Life 
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